About once or twice a month I get an email from someone who essentially says: "it's so awesome that you and I are both enlightened, aren't we awesome in our awesomeness?" I always reply that I am absolutely, most definitely not enlightened, and that by the very tone and words they use in their introductory email, or on their website, or their blog, they absolutely, most definitely aren't either. This tends to piss them off in one way or another, which incites me to laugh, as it certainly seems proof that yep, neither of us is anywhere near the Land of Done.
It is so incredibly hip these days to say that you are Awake. There are lots and lots of folks cruising around claiming Awake. I met a few of them at the retreat I went to last month, though who knows if they really were. Mostly I just listen to the person claiming to be Awake, observe as they gumflap, knowing that I have no way of knowing if they are really Awake or not, but quickly moving away as the stench of ego finally is just too freakin much to bear.
It's been puzzling to me how these emails stir up such righteous indignation inside of me. Because really, who cares? What does it matter that a bunch of silly kids are running around saying they are the King of The Yes?
And as I asked myself these two questions again and again (because in this skin bag called Kate, whatever shakes the ego-jello is about deconstructing my own inner landscape of No) I got that I get ticked off by the bullsh*tters. Because most spiritual seekers believe their load of hooey, and get sidelined and bushwacked and locked up and sunk. And even as I get a big part of this waking up stuff is about seeing through both bullsh*t and bullsh*tters, I absolutely, most definitely want no part of it. I ain't Full-On Awake and that is absolutely, most definitely dang skippy fine.
Sure, Further and all that, and also, in this moment: Yes.
I Yam what I Yam, and I'm merely grateful that this portion of my program comes with kitties and computers and kombucha in the mornings . . .
Brother Tom says it so well, in much gentler language than I ever use with you kind folks: To Be Half Awake and Half Asleep